Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Fun at the Doctors' office

So, today was a very good day... if by good I mean I finally got my Xanax refilled, so I can go on a fun trip with my husband and his mom in two weeks and not spend the entire time locked in the hotel bathroom....

In order to do that, I had to go to the doctor, which wasn't a bad idea, since I keep getting ridiculously dizzy at work and then my head gets all spinny, and I'm sweating and swaying like the boat I'm on is about to turn over, and then I realize that I don't work on a boat and I'm in a land locked state and that people are looking at me really weird, and then I am not allowed to drive for two days.... So yeah, probably a good idea to go get checked out. 

Husband and I agreed that I should probably get some blood work done, check to make sure that my blood isn't poisoning me while it pumps the caffeine to and fro, and so they did... but also, because apparently my doctor is somewhat of a douche, I had an EKG... So now, in less than 2 months, I've had my brain scanned in an MRI, and EEG and and EKG.... I bet our insurance people will love that... and everything says "Normal".... I quote it, because let's be real, nothing about me is normal. 

Getting this EKG required me to wear a hospital gown, and nothing else up top, so when the poor girl came in to plug me in, I apologized that she had to move Mount Vesuvius (aka, my left boob), and she just laughed.  Thankfully, she was a bigger girl and expected how heavy that thing was. It was a little awkward, and at a point where I wanted to make small talk to feel more comfortable, but people seem to get really uncomfortable around me, so I didn't, but instead I did in my head... Probably not the same, but it was a great conversation. About on par with the ones I have with the cat, but that works.

Now, I'm waiting on blood work, so maybe that means I'm not dying, but they didn't do anything about the world spinning super fast around me, which I translated into the world revolves around me... and cutting back on caffeine is starting to kill me. 

Saturday, April 14, 2012

mornings....

So, husband usually beats me at getting out of bed in the mornings, and it's because I'm usually getting to bed a lot later than he does.  It doesn't help that I don't get home until midnight on nights I work, which sucks.  A lot.  This morning wasn't any different.  Husband got out of bed and started working on his homework, while I took over our bed.  It was wonderful. 

And then I woke up. 

I'm cranky in the morning, and husband usually comes back into bed when I've woken up, so that he can combat my crankiness, and cuddle.  But I had to pee, and didn't want him squishing my bladder.  So I asked him if he would go potty for me. He said no.  Then I asked he he'd cup his hands underneath me, so I didn't have to get out of bed, he said no again.  Husband asked if I wanted a bed pan, and I said, "Yep, but only if you're cleaning it out." and then he swore at me and told me I wasn't disabled.  When I protested he said, mentally doesn't count, get your ass outta bed and pee yourself. 

What a fun suck.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Cooking

A little known fact about me, is that I love to cook. I find it relaxing to stand at the stove and create deliciousness for myself and husband. Way I don't like doing, is follow directions, which means anything that isn't a dessert is fair game to adjust. Sometimes, it works... Other times, we go get a cheeseburger. Husband used to cook, a lot more than me, but I am super picky and don't like anything... So he got tired of it and decided cooking was my job. It's not that bad, and it gives one an excuse not to have to do the dishes.

Btw, nutella brownies = amaze balls. X1000000

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Music

I'm pretty sure it's unhealthy that my favorite Police song is about stalking.... but to be fair, it's one of the only good ones.  I actually had ideas for what to write today, but they only happen while I'm driving, or pretending to care in class, so that doesn't help.  I tend to try not to be a douche on the road, though when I'm walking, all bets are off. 

Hmmm, I really had something I wanted to say today, and I'm pretty sure it's gone forever, or until 3am, when I wake up to find dammit kitty and lock her in the bathroom.  She is pure evil and likes to meow at night, when I'm sleeping, and get Husband to wake up and pet her.  Because she's the devil. 

**Random note to myself, wear very loose fitting clothes when you go to visit your family and don't answer any pregnancy questions. **

Maybe if I take a nap, then I will remember things.  Or I'd have gotten a nap.... so win/win!

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Hilarious

So, I find myself to be quite funny. In fact, I make myself laugh all the time. And I can ocacasionaly make others laugh as well... But then I realize they are my friends or family and then I am pretty sure they are actually plotting to put me in the loony bin.

Which would be awesome, as I wouldn't have to wear pants anymore. And I hate pants. A lot.

Saturday, April 7, 2012

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Damn you UPS

So, I ordered an Ipad, not because I'm an entitled biznotch, but because I got an inheritance check and this was a fun purchase to get before I put the rest into a saving account for school and baby making fun.

Well, check out this awesomeness....


Yeah, it did go directly from Anchorage to Louisville, despite the fact that SLC is RIGHT in between the two.  And, yes, it DID sit there for two days just hanging out. 

Now, I'm not opposed to common sense mailing, if it's coming from the east coast and it stops a few times, no big deal... but seriously, Alaska to Kentucky to Utah.... what is wrong with this picture?  Oh well, at some point today, I will have my new toy and will be avoiding work as much as possible.

Monday, April 2, 2012

kay has a migraine.... again

So, I get migraines a lot.  Usually, they consist of sharp, stabbing pain, directly behind my eye.  But lately (this last week, every damn day), I've been getting the nausea migraines.  The ones that make you feel like you've had a lot too much to drink and shouldn't be allowed to walk by yourself to the bathroom. 

Yeah, I don't like those, even if they are a great excuse to skip class. 

So I forgot the medication I picked up yesterday, and headed to class today where I got super sick and wanted to punch a dolphin, since hating things makes me feel better.  I came home to get it, intending to go back, and then the Kitty and I had this conversation.

kitty: Oh boy, she human is home and I want to jump on her lap and get pets.

me: Kitty, I feel like crap, don't step on my belly like that.

kitty: Okay, I will just climb on your boobies and stick my nose up yours to show you that I love you.

me: Kitty, you make me dizzy.  Stop.

kitty: Will you stay home and pet me and love me and be my best friend?

me: Hmm, that's not a bad idea.  I'm a danger on the road when I'm this dizzy.  Let me text work.

kitty: Oh boy, please keep petting me.

me: Kitty, if I stay home, I'm going to bed.

kitty: But you don't play with me when you're in bed.  You are grumpy.

me: Yes, I'm pure evil.  Just like a certain caticus braticus.

kitty: Who is that? Can we play? Will you give me treats?

me: Don't worry.  Here's a treat. I'm going to bed.

So I skipped work, took a 3 hour nap and still feel like crap.  I hate migraines, and the kitty loves her people.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Wake up in the morning...

Feeling like death.  Husband asks how I feel.  So, I tell him:

Children fled in terror at my presence and villages burned to the ground.  I hate being sick.

Convos with the cat

Sometimes, dumb fish kitty talks to me when I'm trying to get other things done.  Usually it's when I'm trying to sleep or do homework.  The other day, when I was dying on the couch due to a severe, nauseating migraine, she and I had this conversation.

me: Kitty, come snuggle.

kitty: Oh boy, it's the she human, she wants to play.

me: No kitty, I'll pet you, but don't lay on my wrists.  That defeats the purpose.

kitty: Okay, got it.  Lay across your arms, directly on your bad wrist.

me: Dammit, kitty. No.  Will you lay in a less douchey way?

kitty: Okay, I will lay with my butt in your face, so that you can feel how soft and amazing my tail is.

me: I regret inviting you to cuddle.

kitty: Should I rearrange myself? I bet I can step on you in ways that make you feel pain you didn't know you had.

me: You're made out of evil.

kitty: Nope, just awesome.  *tail flick in my face*

me: I'm giving up animals.  From now on, I'll just cuddle a cactus.  Much less annoying.

And end.  She's kind of a butt, and always knows when I need to pee.  Her favorite launchpad is my full bladder.